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» Cowboys Stadium: How ‘Bout Them Burgers???
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Cowboys Stadium: How ‘Bout Them Burgers???

By • Nov 8th, 2009 • Category: Burger Blog

Everything, as the famous saying goes, is bigger in Texas.  Nowhere in the Lone Star State is this maxim truer than in the city of Arlington, where the Dallas Cowboys opened their brand-new stadium a few months ago.  At a total price of over 1 billion (yes, with a “B”) dollars, team owner Jerry Jones set out to do everything to the max.

stadiumwide1

He seems to have succeeded.  Cowboys Stadium is the largest domed structure in the world.  It can hold over 110,000 people.  To get in, you enter through the largest working doors on earth: 120-foot-tall sliding glass doors that make up one whole side of the stadium.  Then, of course, there’s this:

screen

That’s the largest hi-def TV screen on the planet.  72 feet high by 160 feet wide.  Over 25,000 square feet of video screen, weighing 1.2 million pounds.  And oh, yeah… it hangs directly over the field, stretching from 20-yard-line to 20-yard-line.

As a lifelong Cowboys fan, I couldn’t wait to get down to Big D for my first game in the new digs.  I was also excited about diving in to some new stadium food.  I had heard that the team, as a matter of course, pulled out the stops with their concessions, going way above and beyond your basic hot dogs and peanuts.  Sure enough, the list of menu options provided plenty of Western-themed surprises: BBQ brisket quesadillas, beef fajita tacos, churros, jalapeno sausage sandwich, Texas catfish po’boys, Texas Frito Pie… even, inexplicably, a New York-style Reuben!

But I had my sights squarely set on the Green Chile Kobe Burger.  It sounded like everything that’s best about the Southwest and Texas, all in one convenient handheld package.  Here’s where I would normally show you a picture of it, then wax poetic about how it looked, and finally gush at great length about how it tasted.  I would do that about the Cowboys Stadium Green Chile Kobe Burger… except that I didn’t have a Cowboys Stadium Green Chile Kobe Burger.

The dirty little secret about the Palace in Dallas?  The stadium may occupy 3 million square feet, but you can’t actually wander around all 3 million square feet.  Two “club level” sections on either side of the field reach from goal line to goal line and can be accessed only by a club level ticket.  I had great seats just 13 rows off the turf, but I did not have a club level ticket.  The Green Chile Kobe Burger is in the club level.  So are the BBQ brisket quesadillas, the Kobe Nacho Dog, the baby back ribs, the sweet potato fries, and the catfish po’boys.  Hell, even the damn New York Reuben I didn’t want was off-limits to the riff-raff!

No, for us poor stiffs, our cheeseburger choices were a bit more limited:

unwrappedburger

That’s the Black Angus Cheeseburger.  Not exactly the way it’s pictured on the LED menu screen directly above the cash register:

menupix

Still, there was reason for hope.  There’s some seriously tasty stadium grub out there.  The double cheeseburger at Fifth Third Ballpark in Michigan was one of the best burgs I’ve had all year.

I wish I could tell you that the Cowboys Stadium “Peasant Level” Black Angus Cheeseburger was a feat of culinary wizardry on par with the gleaming, state-of-the-art stadium it’s served in. But it’s not.  It’s an average-at-best burger that’s maybe a touch better than your local fast-food shop’s dollar-menu offering… except it’s almost 9 times as expensive.

Sigh. On the upside, my view while eating the burger was spectacular:

burgercheerleaders

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3 Responses to “Cowboys Stadium: How ‘Bout Them Burgers???”

  1. 1
    Jeff Says:

    Good post.

    With a view like that, I think any burger might go down pretty easy, $8.50 be damned.

  2. 2
    Jody Says:

    Hilarious. I always enjoy your posts, keep writing. I have no comment about the view ;)

  3. 3
    Dallas Cowboys Now Says:

    Hey I feel the DC’s have done pretty good this season and I look forward for 2010 season.

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